These past few weeks have been a muddle of thoughts and emotions. I feel like I’ve come out a dark tunnel that was so low I had to stoop to walk through, stoop so low my back was bent over double.
Now I’m out the glare of the light is hitting my eyes and my whole is body is grateful to be able to stretch again but yet I still feel stiff.
Stiff as in slow to move on and appreciate what I have learnt on my travel through this dark dingy tunnel that blinded me into darkness and dulled my senses.
The glare hitting my eyes is slowing starting to see things clearly as I adjust to my surroundings of a new depth and understanding of myself.
One thing I do know is who I am, who I was and who I will always be.
I know now that I can’t be someone I’m not. I can’t change my thinking and pretend I am someone or something else. I can’t change values that have been instilled in me from as far back as I can remember. Values that I hold dear and live my life accordingly. Principles that will never waver.
I can’t be wrong when I have to always be right.
I have to be true to myself, if that’s not possible then how can I be true to anyone else? Who will appreciate me when I can’t appreciate myself?
I think before anyone sets out to demand another person fits their ideal mould they should first ask themselves do they want a manufactured “perfect” friend/partner or do they want someone that’s real and genuine who is being themselves and not forcing it to just please you.
I also think one should look at themselves first and see just how honest they are being to their own selves.
Because if a person is confident and happy in their own skin they will never feel they need to change anyone else.